Take 1:

Christine:
In proofs he sang to me,
In notes he came,
The graphs which call to me,
And solve my name.

And do I prove again,
For now I find
The Phaaantom of the Math book is here,
Inside my mind.

Phantom:
Solve once again with me
Our empty set
My matrix of our range
Converges yet

...

Take 2:

Christine:
In points he sang to me,
In curves he came,
That graph which calls to me,
And plots my name.

And do I graph again,
For now I find
The Phaaantom of the Math book is here,
Inside my mind.

Phantom:
Solve once again with me
This empty set
The sequence of our love
Converges yet

And, though you turn from me
With cos and sine,
The Phaaaaantom of the Math Book is there,
Inside your mind.

Christine:
Those who have seen your print
Draw back in fear.
I am the plots you draw

Phantom:
My points, in here.

Christine/Phantom:
My/your plotting and your/my curves
In one combined
The Phaaaantom of the Maath Book is there
Inside my/your mind!

Phantom:
In all your axioms
T'was always true:
That proof and mystery

Christine:
Lay both in you...

Christine/Phantom:
And in this Hausdorff Space,
With sets defined:
The Phaaaaaaantom of the Math Book is there,
Inside my/your mind.

Christine:
He's there, the Phaantom of the Maath Book...
(starts vocalizing with ever increasing pitch)

Phantom:
Solve, my angel of graphing.

Christine:
(keeps vocalizing)

Phantom:
Solve, my angel.

Christine:
(even higher...)

Phantom:
Solve, for me!

Christine:
(finally breaks maximum pitch, and all lights go out.)

All names have been Made impersonal, movie-based.  Obviously, they weren't originally that way..

---

After class, Meg (Christine's best friend) comes and talks to her...

Meg:
Christine, Christine

Phantom (echo):
Christine

Meg:
Where in the school have you been hiding?
Really, you were perfect!
I only wish I knew your secret:
Who is your great tutor?

Christine:
Becca once spoke of an angel
I used to dream he'd appear
Now as I graph I can sense him
And I'd know he's here!

Here in this calc he calls me softly
Somewhere inside, hiding
Somehow I know he's always with me
He, the unseen math nerd.

Meg:
Christine, you must have been dreaming,
Weird things like this don't come true.
Christine, you're talking in math terms
And it's not like you!

Christine:
Angel of graphing, guide and guardian!
Grant to me your glory!

Meg:
Who is this angel, this

Both:
Angel of graphing, hide no longer!
Strange and secret angel!

Christine:
He's with me even now-

Meg:
-Your hands are cold-

Christine:
-All around me-

Meg:
-Your face, Christine
It's white...

Christine:
It frightens me...

Meg:
Don't be frightened...

----

After school, Christine is alone (apparently) in the math room.  Raoul, someone wish a crush, comes to look for her, but the door is locked.  He stands outside, listening...

Phantom:
Insolent boy, this slave of factors,
Basking in your functions.
Ignorant fool, this brave young suitor,
Sharing in my math notes.

Christine:
Angel I hear you; solve, I listen
Stay by my side, guide me
Angel, my skills were weak, forgive me
Enter at last, master.

Phantom:
Flattering child, you shall learn me
See what in problems I hide.
Look at your face in the smart-screen
I am there inside!

Christine:
Angel of graphing, guide and guardian
Grant to me your answers
Angel of graphing, hide no longer
Come to me, strange angel!

Phantom:
I am your angel of graphing....
Come to me, angel of graphing...

Raoul:
Whose is that voice?  Who's that in there?!

Phantom:
I am your angel of graphing...

Raoul:
(Christine!  Christine!)

Phantom:
Come to me, angel of graphing...

Carlotta, the class nerd, is busy explaining the way to solve a differential equation for the class.  She is standing at the front of the class...  Suddenly, the projector screen falls down and hits her on the head.

Carlotta:
No more!  I ain't gonna teach you math no more...  This class is creepy.

Student 1:
Who's going to teach us this work?

Student 2:
Christine can teach it...

Student 1:
A core-class girl?

Student 2:
Let her teach you, sir... She has been well taught.

Christine, breaking out into song:

Think of d

Think of d, think of d fondly, when we said "dy"
Remember d's, over dx, please promise me you'll try!
When you find, that once again you solve, implicitly with this dt
If you ever find an answer, spare a thought for d.

(At some point, this has transformed from the classroom to her giving this lecture in a Conference or Multi-purpose room to all the calc students of some higher grade.)

We never said our integrals were clean, or not posessing a "plus C"
But if our rates are still related, stop and think of d.

Think of all the d's we've used this time,
Don't think about the d's we've not defined...

Think of d, think of d waiting silent and d-signed
Invert this y, over dy; well, that integral's just ln!
But when this is, within another f, we must use the inverse chain rule:
There will never be a day, when I don't solve du!

(Suddenly, Raoul stands up and begins to pace.)

Raoul:
Can it be, can it be Christine?

(at this point, he walks out of class, prompting some guy to shout "Raoul!", but he just keeps on going.)

Long ago, it was so long ago; how young and innocent we were;
She may not remember d, but I remember (her)-

Christine (by now is finishing up the lecture by repeating something):

We never said our integrals were clean, or not posessing a "plus C"
But please promise me that somethimes, you will think

(a pause, and then she repeats "of" in increasingly high vocals)

d!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

(To thunderous applause.)

Posted by Saichu:
So, Frank and I were thinking about the prologue of teh Phantom of the Opera..  well, so here are some of the lines for future reference:

Auctioner:
*Bangs old MUN gavel* So.  Madam, sir?  Lot 665, ladies and gentlemen, a 1980s slide rule with electronic accuracy.  This item, discovered in the vaults of the Math Room, still in working order, ladies and gentlemen!

Assistant:
Showing here [guy does a few calculations]

Auctioner:
May I commence at 71/5 francs?  71/5, thank you!  Yes, 61/3 from you, sir, thank you very much.  Madam Giry?  25?  Thank you, madam.  25 I bid.  Do I hear 91/3?  91/3!  And 35?  Selling at 91/3 francs, then.  Going once, going twice?  Sold, for 91/3 francs, to the Viconte de Changley.  Thank you, sir.

Raoul:
A collector's piece, indeed... Every marking, exactly as she said. She often spoke of you my friend, your laquered surface and your figuring of steel...  Will you calculate, when all the rest of us are dead?

Auctioner:
Lot 666, then.  A calculator in pieces.  Some of you may recall the strange affair of the Phantom of the Math Book, a mystery never fully explained.  We're told, ladies and gentlemen, that this is the same calculator that factors into the famous disaster!  Our math nerds have repaired it, and wired parts of it from the new 3D graphing system.  Perhaps we can frighten away the ghost of so many years ago... with a little n-dimensionality.  Gentlemen!